Day 14

Someone emailed me today and asked me who I am.

If I’m anyone, I think I’m that guy on the train who leans across and tells you that the answer for 9 Across is Aardvark. And when you look at me funny, I tell you it has a double A at the start.

Someone told me I’m like shares in resources. I go up and down, but must eventually go up. That’s what she said.

But resources aren’t going so well. What when the resources run out?

Tomorrow is the birthday of the girl that I thought I loved. I want to call. But maybe I want her to think I forgot? I want to call and tell her I forgot, but then remembered, and how is she? But she won’t speak to me, I’m sure.

I have a beautiful friend whose face lights up when she sees dogs. She can’t help it, and couldn’t say why. It’s something primal, I think. Like John Lennon sung about. Maybe it was John Lennon, anyway. Like that dogs were a primal enemy – a threat – and we’ve conquered them, in our own way. Like we can’t help but smile when we see them because we’re reminded of our own brilliance and power in cheating the primal. We’ve cultivated purely for the enjoyment of it, to fend off primal instinct.

That’s what I think, anyway.

Maybe I won’t call this girl.

by Sparrokei